..In Pursuit Of My Future..

I want to thank you to my friends that was with me yesterday and today..helping me getting up from my knees..Wiah help a lot on this *thnx wiah!, also my sister Quini and my bestie from 4B Menglait Myzah..also thnx to yum, aqim, hafidz(my neighbours) ...I appreciate it so much guys, love you all for helping me ..I guess im okay, but its gonna get me a lifetime to really moved on..i love her so much and i still do.

Also to Quini, your such a sweetheart dear..posting me in her blog :) <3 love you my sister from another mother and father..hehe

Tosay had been a nightmare for me, i woke up early in the morning and i feel a slight pain or ache in the head..I ignored it..woke up and straight to shower, and i feel my ache getting worster and worster..So in my head was a migrain ache strikes me, maybe when i was a sleep..So after shower went to get my uniform, and told my mum am having a migrain..She looks worried, but yea it was physics test yesterday paper one and two..so i put my migarin aside..wore my uniform, and went down to the kitchen..then i felt a bit sick, decided not to eat..5 mins later, went to my bathroom and puke!mahn, u dont want to puke in the morning where your stomach is empty..Its torturing in the brain, eyes and in the stomach..so told my mum i puke, and i decided to stay at home..coz theres no way i could beat my migrain, it hurts so badly..

Reminds me of my mid year exam :/ (in menglait) , where i gave up on my physics paper coz i had migrain..Out of 11 pages i answered only two...it also reminds me of SMSS Monthly test on physics, where i missed it due to migrain.. im moody about this and is it just a coincidence? or is it something else..A part of my downfall this year, is my migrain problems.. :/ , im sad about this..i wish theres is a cure to migrain :/..i hate this..I got my mc, and im gonna have my test nanti :/ ..pheww! sucks?isn it?..i blame myself for this, i listened to my skullcandy for 2 hours while asleep..at its max volume, i couldnt help myself to listen..foolish me

TOnight, guess what?i broke up with Iza..the reason?let it be untold..i dont want to hurt anybody here..I do love her, so much..But by her decision, & what she done..I was sad, so many things went through my mind that night, i decided to end it and i did..dont take me for granted guys coz i have my own good reasons to it..i dont want to say much..All i can is her lost and my gain..Usually when it comes to things like this ill type a thousand words about it..this time, i dont think so..i got nothing to lose and i got nothing to win..and it wont bring her back to me..I guess, my heart is broken so many times now that i cant really feel a thing about this..But all i can do is just be PATIENT but patient doesnt mean that i am weak..for now, let it be

Alright, its Wednesday and its 3 more days until xam..Pheww, *pressured..My mum went to Singapore yesterday -.- ..she just got back from uk and now Singapore lagi..im missing her so much :/ i miss her cooking..And its also had been 3 weeks since my sis left Brunei for UK in Exeter..i am now feel the huge impact of her leaving..The house feels so dull without her..Everything is changing, Seasons are changing..Now its just me and my two younger brothers..

I feel pressured right now, i have my responsibilities to them..Taking care of them.. :/ ..I miss my sis a lot..She's so beautiful in everyway..She's my sweetheart and i cant hope to see her in sadness there..In starvation..I feel like crying right now..im such a sissy..I know this a faze that i have to get through..I know she is more challenged there, without my wonder women (my Mum)..But i also know what she is capable of..I know that she is tough..3 weeks have passed and she looks so happy there..Buying dozen of shoes, sandal and boots :') haha..as predicted second day there she went shopping for her wardrobe..She's cute alright :')

Here are pictures from my lappy :), the belows are from izzat's Nikon Dslr and the photographer of that day Fared..Just your normal class vaining day :) more pictures on my lappy, but so tired to upload them all..this is all :)

Finally, the moment ive been waiting for 2 weeks..SKULLCANDIES!!huhu, my mum just got back from UK sending my older sis, ka jikah..She's in Exeter now..So yeah, my mum just got back and now i have an additional two skullcandies..Adding to my older ones the hesh type..this time my mum got me a rasta G.I. and a lowrider..Just the type that im looking for..i thought my mum just bought me one, but turns out a surprise an additional of another different kind..My mum knows me well, i always carry around my mp3..Listening to music 25% of everyday of my life..Im a music addict.

About G.i. Rasta:
No soldier on record has ever lost a battle while wearing the G.I. headphones. Ever.

• Speaker Diameter: 40mm
• Magnet Type: NdFeB
• Frequency range: 18 -20K Hz
• Impedance: 50 ohms
• Max Input Power: 400mw
• Cable Type: Aluminum Braided
• Cable Length: 1.2m
• Plug Type: 3.5mm Gold Plated

Accessories: Emergency Bottle Opener, Extender Cable, Interchangeable Ear Pads, Satin Travel Bag, 6.3mm Gold Plated Adapter

59.99 pounds.

About Lowrider:

You always say, "...when we cross that bridge..." Are you referring metaphorically to consumption, the bridge between creation and destruction? If so, you should buy a dozen colors of Lowrider headphones right away. Your wardrobe needs candy paint to match all those sneakers. Don't be slippin'.29.79pounds

Finally i got these two..

MY older hesh type:

Fisticuffs with the boss could potentially be confused by some at the office as a sign of insubordination. Vigorous dancing on his desk with exotic facial contortions and frequent airborne double-bird fist pumping hand gestures while wearing Hesh headphones is probably a more diplomatic way of saying, "Leave me alone so I can rock again."

• Speaker Diameter: 50mm
• Magnet Type: NdFeB
• Frequency range: 18 -20K Hz
• Impedance: 32 ohms
• Max Input Power: 100mw
• Cable Type: Nylon Braided
• Cable Length: 1.2m
• Plug Type: 3.5mm Gold Plated

Now since i owe my mum B$250, -.- ..she asked me to pay..haha, but to me 250 is so worth it..Skullcandies is crushing my skulls..i feel banged up and slammed by these mean machines..i love it!haha :P anyways im looking forward to my next badge set of skullcandies, im ordering the "Full Metal Jacket" and "Viking Hesh"..probably next year when i go to uk again..

Alright guys, been listening to these song for more than a hundred times now, since her..Everytime i listen to it it reminds me of her, and as time passes it is starting to turn, starting to remind me of my bestie Iza..She's a wonderful person, and a part of me moving on is bcoz of her..i figured out she deserve credit for it..And this for you zaa, i cant sing like the way you do ..But every words from this song i mean it dear, i cant be near to you so long, i may seem cool, calm relax maybe its my face its hiding my heartbeat that beats faster, im also tripin on words, and now my heads spinning around thinking about the right words, coz im not sure if my words are coming out right ..Guess im not that calm and relax as i thought i was.. ZA Forever Friends?coz right know all i know is that i will always want to know where you are..




You And Me"

What day is it? And in what month?
This clock never seemed so alive
I can't keep up and I can't back down
I've been losing so much time

'Cause it's you and me and all of the people with nothing to do
Nothing to lose
And it's you and me and all other people
And I don't know why, I can't keep my eyes off of you

One of the things that I want to say just aren't coming out right
I'm tripping on words
You've got my head spinning
I don't know where to go from here

'Cause it's you and me and all of the people with nothing to do
Nothing to prove
And it's you and me and all other people
And I don't know why, I can't keep my eyes off of you

There's something about you now
I can't quite figure out
Everything she does is beautiful
Everything she does is right

'Cause it's you and me and all of the people with nothing to do
Nothing to lose
And it's you and me and all other people
And I don't know why, I can't keep my eyes off of you
and me and all other people with nothing to do
Nothing to prove
And it's you and me and all other people
And I don't know why, I can't keep my eyes off of you

What day is it?
And in what month?
This clock never seemed so alive

Guess im jobless, got nothing to do..Sorry to keep you waiting..

Hello guys and gals, yea im updating my blog..I haven.t updated for quite a while now so yea..As usual im gonna talk about so many thing that revolves around me..okay, The past 3 weeks have been like hell to me, bcoz of what had happened between me and her..We ended it in saddest possible way it could..I felt like im loosing my mind, but then it remembers me of something..The saying that i made "life is never fair", "life is cold" and "the world is a place where so many don't cares and so few really cares"..At first, i thought that i was never gonna let it end this way..But by her actions, i woke up and knew she was never the right one..For me to give up just like that..i know right amazing, but then there's a really good reasons behind it..But then i could be so cold, that words from my mouth could be like a stabbing knife..but what the hell?it wont change a thing so yea..BYE BYE! :) my gain your lost..

*only few of my closest friends know about this, who doesn't knows?hmm, don't waste your time on reading the above.

And now im finally back on my feet standing, never thought that i would..but i am right now..a lot of thnx to wiah, iza, myz, kyra and quini..thnx guys appreciate it so so very much..lending your shoulders, listening and making me believe that i can move on..so yeah, imma already gone and moved on..

Yesterday on Sat 10 October, my house was open for raya starts at 5.30 and ended at 1 am tadi..haha, the first one to come was Sheikh Izzat(my best buddy for nearly 4 yrs), second was Datul and Fatin Afikah, they came together..Love you guys!haha..the open house was for my menglait-ians, gaahhhh i miss them so much and some of my closest friends..At first i thought less than half was gonna come, turns out nearly all of them.happy much and all thanks to Myzah..Also sir Azim was there bring out the boys, be convoy haha, i was really surprised he's a tpteacher this year in menglait, tho he never really get the chance to teach 4b but he does know my name!haha but Tchr ida, hani and yati wasn't i miss these wonderful teachers of mine..But its okay!..Catch up with my menglait friends, how school and other..Having them around really makes me happy, after all its nearly 4yrs of friendship..their the guys who really knows me..hehe, Love you my bestie in menglait!!

That day was really exhausting for me, bcoz of it i didnt go to school..coz i need to clean up my room and the house..And also cook, i cook the spaghetti and give spices to the chicken..The menu was really much, coz my family had opened the house for three times sudh..After that day ends, i guess i can say its a success..Though Iza wasn't there, a lil of disappointment there but its okay babe!still love you, haha :P

Friday 9th Oct, i also felt the football pitch HAHAHA, feels so great to play and train football again..(masih ada kali ah skill ku :P) after waiting for more than a month to play i finally get a piece of football..of course training is also a good way to release tension..so i blasted the football all over..though a slightness change in stamina..don't worry, ill get back my stamina :P

Overall my three weeks of hell has ended, and im happy about it..Hope next week i'll be the same :)